Life's Ride...

I am rolling…on a carbon frame Trek ...and through life.

Exhilarating….sometimes at break neck speeds…other times cruising along with no effort…

The climbing of hills and the descending into the depths…

At times the wind to your back, pushing you along with no effort…or the chilling head wind to be weathered...laboring.

Sometimes the ride is with friends…and other times the blaring silence of being alone.

Regardless, I continue….to push…and at the end…when the ride comes to a close, I pray that I have given it my all…no regrets.

For the blessing is in the ride granted.

Creating a Esprit de Corps with Your Family

An ultra marathoner has a crew, especially if it’s a difficult 100 miler. You, know…those people that take care of the runner…sometimes pacing…sometimes taking care of blisters and feet…sometimes encouraging…other times admonishing. A lead cyclist in the Tour has somewhat the same thing….the Domestique…the workers….pulling the team…protecting the lead cyclist of the time…working together…a unit…a fine tuned machine.

My wife and I look at our family in somewhat the same way…oh….she doesn’t think about ultra crews or domesiques…but that is how I relate it. A unit…a Team….in fact we both refer to our family as a whole as Team Elliott…all 6 of us…and with that, Bren and I both have made attempts to create an Esprit de Corps.

It is encouraging how we see our kids help out each other. We often get comments from outsiders as how well our kids get along…usually followed up with the question, “Do they ever argue or fight?”…To answer that question honestly…”Hardly ever.” Sometimes Luke may pick on Macy and Hope…usually in fun…and sometimes the get upset with him…but it is nearly always short lived. This usually has a follow up question…”What do we do to keep them from fighting.” Frankly, I have to credit my wife with that…and how they behave…and support one another….and that got me thinking. What do we, as parents, do to foster such behavior? How do we create an Esprit de Corps? Why is that Luke is already asking when he and Kyle can share a room…and why did my girls want to share a room? Why is that I have seen Luke willing to take the blame for something that Macy has done…and why have I seen Macy run to the defense of Luke? My wife and I began to discuss…and below are some of my thoughts. Yes…I also believe some of them are transferable to the business world…and others are unique to a family.

One of Bren’s favorite mantras is “The World Does NOT Revolve around You.” (I usually respond in jest, that it does around me…cause I pick origin of the coordinate system. All the engineers just chuckled..the rest of you either rolled your eyes or looked confused.) I hear her say this Mantra nearly once a week. It was something we taught our kids from birth…even when Luke was the only one for a while…and we never acted like the world stopped on their command…or when they threw temper tantrums…Nope…throw a fit…and then go sit in time out…heck…Luke sat in time out so much he broke the time out chair by the time he was 3. The world doesn’t revolve around you…or anyone else…simple fact of life. It seems to be easier to learn this with the more kids you have I think…Kyle will know that the world does not revolve around him by the time he can verbalize his thoughts. We now have 4 kids that know that it is not all about them…but each other.

That brings me to my next point…Bren has made a very concerted effort to teach the kids to be thoughtful of others. We as family usually adopt family at Christmas. Our kids have "financially adopted" a Child in Guatemala through a foundation….they see what the money does and how it helps the child or the family. And from this, we try to parlay it into being thoughtful of your siblings. One of the coolest things is seeing one of your children really proud of the accomplishments of their brother or sister. Watching them brag on each other to outsiders is kinda cool.

Bren and I do our best to not create an environment to where there is resentment of the siblings. We never to say, “Why can’t you do that like your sister.”…or “Why can’t you be more like your brother?” We understand that each kid has different gifts…and do everything we can to help develop those gifts and interest. We don’t compare the grades of the siblings…only that they do their absolute best in all they do and compete with their classmates. In fact, the grades of each child are known only to us…Mom and Dad….trust me….that is enough pressure.

There are days when the kids will come home from school and have had a rough day. We have made every effort to make home the refuge from the storms of life. Bren will say nearly every week that at the end of the day you will always have each other. You may have a "so called" friend impale you in the back to the hilt...but you can always rely on the love of your brother or sister. I am always trying to instill the loyalty you have with each other. We may have our differences in house...but when it comes to the outside world..."I have my siblings' back." I have seen how that has helped bond our kids.

Lastly…we try to spend quality time together as a unit….we try to eat dinner together in the evenings. Sometimes this proves really difficult with all the activities. We take at least one vacation trip a year together as a family. We laugh a lot…sometimes we just like being silly. We don’t allow a lot of whining. In fact that is our family motto, “No Whining!”….just ask my 5 year old, Hope. More than once I have asked one of them when they get a little whiny…”What is our Motto?”…and “What are you doing right now?” That usually rings a bell with them and they usually quit.

Trust me…Bren and I have made a lot of mistakes parenting…but we try our best….pray a lot…laugh at ourselves…and by the Grace of God…we have been blessed.

p.s. We came up with the Team Elliott Logo...everything in it has a meaning...if you are interested about what it all means...email me at" delliott (@) timberlakedickson.com

Beauty and the Beast...and the Beast was slain...

Ok…here we go…a synapsis of Beauty and the Beast 67 mile ride…just south of the piney woods of Tyler Texas. The course…67 miles of hills…non stop…ascending …descending…over and over …and over…if you hate climbing…then this race would be torture…I love climbing though…so when the weather of 78 degrees with no wind was forecasted…I thought that it may be a pretty good day.

We get there…and Michael, Amber and I line up…and we are off….the start of these things is always a little hairy…people are excited…we are in tight…18 inches from each other….and the adrenaline usually has people cooking it…so after about a ½ mile…I look down and we are doing 27mph…with a 90 degree turn coming up…slowed…hold the line…I made it through…Amber made it through…and then we hear a crash…a quick glance…Michael was down…Amber and I look at each other…concerned…she asked if we go back…there was no way…without causing another pile up. I say we go on….and at the first stop we will wait to see. It was not to be…Michael escaped any serious injury…but the bike’s shifter for the rear gear set was broken. He was out.

The hills commence…and I just hold a good pace…keeping the heart rate down…and learned that climbing may be my forte…I passed a lot of people on hills…and with not a whole of lot of effort. At about mile 5 or so I must have passed Amber on a hill…and didn’t immediately realize it. About 10 miles later it was to be confirmed by our friend Don who served as a support vehicle. I pull into the aid station at mile 20…to take care of some “over hydration” and refill water bottles…Don told me that Amber was about a mile behind me…and as I leave…she was pulling in. She was doing great…looking strong…and then gave me her blessing to go hammer this course like a monster…and I was off…for the next 40 miles…hills…more hills….keeping a great pace…keeping the heart rate in check. Passing…and occasionally looking back and seeing cyclist trying to stay on my wheel. At mile 63…there is a hill called the Beast…I get there in good order….and notice that no one is riding up it….they were walking there bikes up that hill….then and there I knew that I would not be one of those people…even if I died in the saddle. For nearly a mile…the steepness…it took nearly 5 minutes to get up there…and at the top the heart felt like it was about to explode….as I neared the top…I heard a cyclist who had raced the Beast….shout out “TAKE THAT HILL MARINE.” Breathing was loud…the sweat dripped…and DONE….I tore the gates of hell of it’s hinges and killed the BEAST! Four miles to the finish…and I put it in the big ring and rode it in at 24mph…and averaged 18.1mph for the entire 67 miles. I was elated…felt like I rode well for the first long ride of the year…till then the longest was 2 ½ hours on the trainer. Ok…I have a base to work with now. As for Amber…she finished in a great time and averaged 17.2mph. Michael was a bit scraped up…but nothing serious…and so…we will PRESS ON!

Up to Speed....and when to start the Burn...

Ok…ok…neglected…very neglected and if it was an actual human child I am sure the CPS would have harshly knocked on the front door...I speak of my blog of course.

Team Elliott is rolling….with a full head of steam I might add….Kyle is now 3 months old….and growing. Hope has 2 soccer games under her belt for the season…plays both forward and goalie…and will tell you that when she is in goal…the BOX is hers…you come…you may get taking out. It sounds like I am joking…I am not….she looks for contact. Macy has yet to start softball…but it is afoot. Both girls are kicking it in Girl Scouts and Y Princess too…with 2 campouts in the next month or so… My proud moment for Macy was when she was one of 7 selected from 700 to have a piece of her artwork auctioned off for a school fund raiser...it went for $105.00...and no...it was purchased by someone that was not a family member...frankly I don't know who bought it. I WAS LIKE OVER THE TOP PROUD!


Luke has commenced baseball….and oh how I love the sound of that. I am helping coach….and will help out with Macy’s team when need be. Luke has crossed over into Boy Scouts…and has gone and spent the night on the USS Lexington in January. In February both he and I went with the troop to camp 2 nights in Palo Duro Canyon…it stayed in the 30’s for most of the time….and the entire Troop knocked out a 10 mile hike with minimal whining….and I got in a good 15 mile run by running ahead ½ mile and doubling back to end of the troop…and then do it all over again…Loved it.


Bren is busy too…and I can’t imagine why…there are only 4 kids to take care of…and she is the home room mom for the kids…and goes to Mom to Mom Bible Study….and until recently (February 26) helped me as Cubmaster and was the Cub Scout Pack Treasurer….we have given up both rolls. She has also started back to the gym 3 to 4 days a week…and getting back in shape. She really is an amazing woman. I can’t understand why there were never many parents that would use the excuse, “I don’t have time” when I asked them to volunteer…;-)

For me...I still read alot...I still practice magic and slight of hand...and I still work 50+ hours a week as a 100% commission salesman...and as for training...it is going…well it actually is going really strong. I have only missed 2 schedule workouts since my mom broke her hip December 19…and both of those were that week. I have been doing a lot of riding on the bike….a lot of core work…and some weights too. The first race of the season is Beauty & the Beast this coming weekend.. out in East Texas….67 miles of unrelenting hills…of suffering and anguish. My teammate, Amber asked how we plan on riding it. I respond, “We have a steady pace for the first 50 miles. Then we see how many matches are left in the book. If over ½ the book is left…then we start the burn…and hopefully as the last match extinguishes…we cross the finish line.”

Press On!

Girl Scouts Practicing Communism

My daughter, Macy, set out to be the number one salesman in her Girl Scout Troop in cookie sales. That is how she rolls….sets goals…then does not let absolutely anything deter her. That meant that she would go and sale door to door in the rain…on multiple occasions. Her secondary goal was to sale 250 boxes, thinking that it would put her on top. She fell a bit short on the 250 boxes. On whether she was the top salesman…we don’t know…and thus I am writing this post.

My wife sent an email to the “cookie mom” of her troop, inquiring about where Macy stood in cookie sales. This was the response to her email…verbatim….from the cookie mom.

“There's not necessarily a "place" or a rank of the girls, we want to encourage everyone to sell what they can and not creat (sic) too much pressure on the girls. That said, Macy did VERY well among the other members of her patrol and the troop as a whole. She has earned an additional patch for selling 200+ orders in the initial order taking.”

ARE YOU KIDDING?!?!?!? We don’t want to create too much pressure? Are we afraid that someone feelings are going to be hurt? Are we afraid of Character Building? It is Girl Scout Cookies…not a lively hood. Have we grown so concerned about guarding our precious little ones that we cannot let them grow up? Isn’t being in Girl Scouts suppose to empower our girls and help them become viable and successful members of society? Why yes! This is what I found posted on the Girl Scout Website.

“The Girl Scout Cookie Program is much more than a fundraiser.

It’s a fun way for girls of all ages to earn the money that fuels their dreams, and it’s a hands-on leadership and entrepreneurial program unlike any other in the world. The knowledge and skills they learn will serve them well for a lifetime. Girls gain a wealth of essential skills, not from a book, but from real-life experiences that build a strong foundation for success. Girls will learn the important skills of: goal setting, decision making, money management, people skills and business ethics. You can find out more information on these 5 skills and how they tie into the Girl Scout Leadership Experience by reading the information about Cookie Program 5 Skills and Girl Scout Leadership Outcomes on our website. “

It states clearly that the purpose to sale cookies is to teach entrepreneurial skills...skills that will "serve" them well for a lifetime...not from a book...but from real-life experiences. Whoa...hold the horses..."REAL LIFE EXPERIENCES." You mean not everyone can be first...not everyone will sell a whole lot...and yet we want to protect them for getting their feeling hurt...from too much pressure. Well...life provides pressure....from taking a test...to standing up and reciting the Scout Oath in a Board of Review.

It's not about Macy being first either. In fact, I wouldn't have a problem if she was at the back of the pack...as long as she did her best. For some of the best life's lessons happen when we don't do as well as we had hoped.

Let me set the record straight. I am Cubmaster of a Pack…and our little Pack sold nearly $20,000 of popcorn. Yes…Our Popcorn Chairman, Brannon, makes it very competitive. My son, Luke learned you got 4 tickets to a Rangers Baseball game if you sold a $1000.00. That was his goal…and he did it!!! We award our top salesmen in the pack with generous gift cards…the top salesman in each den got to throw a pie in their Den Leaders Face. I, as Cubmaster, got “pied” by the top salesman mid sales period. One year Luke didn’t meet his goal…he was very disappointed…he dealt with it…and next year…came back with a vengeance. One boy in our Troop was impressed with how well Luke did his second year. That same kid came back the next year…sold $2000.00 and was top salesman. Character building…becoming the best you can be…learning about disappointments…and learning FROM disappointments. That is life…that is what my wife and I try to instill in our kids. You don’t have to be the best…but you better give your best.

So....the story with Macy’s troop gets worse. When arriving at a troop meeting, they were told not to discuss how many boxes of cookies each girl sold. Despite this, Macy learned that two girls sold….drum roll please…ZERO!...and another girl was right behind Macy at 209 Boxes. Ok…are you ready for this. The troop was going to vote with what to do with the profits…and do you know how much say so Macy got in that decision. That’s right…the same as the girls that sold ZERO! It sounded like it was a subplot of George Orwell’s "Animal Farm" depicting Communism. Macy wanted to give some of the money to Children’s Hospital in honor of her friend, Sarah Grace, fighting cancer. She didn't even get to put in her suggestion because of a lack of time. Therefore the Troop decided differently. Macy was disgusted…I rarely see her this angry. Of Course we used it as a Character Building exercise in Team Elliott…That even when you produce like that, you sometimes have to know that you just did your best. I believe in what goes around comes around….and I believe that non producers eventually get called out in life…and I believe that it is not too early to begin to teach that to your children. I feel really sorry for those other girls…I really do…despite the Girl Scouts saying they are empowering girls…they are stunting their growth. Trust Me…TEAM ELLIOTT is not shielding our precious little egos…we are attempting to build Character…despite the Girl Scouts…communism and all. WE teach them that performance counts...in school, in Scouts, in Sports...and In Life. Tonight at the dinner table, I was telling Macy that her drive, her goal setting, and her entrepreneurial spirit will one day allow her not to have to work for anybody else...but that she will own the company...she will have those other girls working for her. That is empowering your daughter.

Press On!

p.s. In full disclosure, I am a straight 100% commission salesman...of course there is no pressure there;-) I am so glad that my parents, my Scoutmaster, my coaches, and my Marine Corps Drill Instructors and Commanding Officers shielded me and protected my fragile ego.

And for the record...TEAM ELLIOTT laughs more than most...jokes around a lot...we are not intense all the time...but don't get in Macy's way if she has a goal...